APRIL IS SEXUAL ASSAULT AWARENESS MONTH (SAAM)

The month of April has been designated Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM) in the United States. The goal of SAAM is to raise public awareness about sexual violence and to educate communities and individuals on how to prevent sexual violence. 

TUESDAY APRIL 3, 2012

"A DAY OF ACTION"

THIS NATIONALLY RECOGNIZED DAY PROVIDES AN OPPORTUNITY FOR PREVENTION ADVOCATES TO ENGAGE WITH THEIR COMMUNITIES. THIS YEAR, PROCLAIM “IT’S TIME … TO TALK ABOUT IT” BY USING SOCIAL MEDIA TO JOIN THE CONVERSATION. BY CHANGING YOUR PROFILE PICTURES AND FOCUSING YOUR STATUS UPDATES, TWEETS, AND BLOG POSTS ON SAAM AND THE DAY OF ACTION, YOU CAN ENGAGE ONLINE COMMUNITIES IN SEXUAL VIOLENCE PREVENTION.

It is so necessary to realize the importance of the awareness of sexual abuse and sexual assault.  One out of four women, and one out of six men have been sexually abused in their lifetime.  Truthfully, these numbers are not exactly accurate because most cases of abuse are never reported.  It's time to speak to our children about the truth behind sex, and sexual violence.  This month take a stand in the prevention of sexual violence.

Please join me Friday, April 20, 2012  at 7:00 p.m.

Ark of Safety Christian Church

2529 Charwood Street

St. Charles, MO 63301

I will be speaking, along with Dr. Gloria Johnson, and Catina Lampkin of Life Source Consultants.  We will be talking about the importance of speaking up about sexual abuse.  There will be free counselors on hand if needed.  Hope to see you there!!!!

For more information regarding SAAM, please visit http://www.nsvrc.org/saam/sexual-assault-awareness-month-home.

THERE IS PURPOSE!

Dionna Latimer

Hello Readers!!!  First let me start off with an apology.  I am behind on my post from last week. It's good to know you all are actually reading my blogs!  Thank you!  I am in school as well, finally finishing my undergraduate degree in communications.  This past week was finals, and after the class was done, so were a lot of things unfortunately.  I lost a little bit of motivation.

I have so much to talk about this week!  Like I said before, I lost my momentum this past week.  Usually when that happens, I try to examine myself to see if there is something in my life that is blocking my ears from hearing from God.  But sometimes He just remains silent so I can seek Him.  Now I am nowhere near perfect, but I do like to do a self-examination every now and then.  Well today was just the examination I needed.  I, as well as a good friend of mine, was able to get tickets to go to the Oprah's Lifeclass.  When I tell you it was so awesome, OMGEE!!!  It was fantastic!  Bishop T.D. Jakes was the special guest, and man did he have a Word.  The topic of the class was, "Live on Purpose."  I didn't have a pen or paper with me, because I surely wish I could have taken notes.  Before I went to this show, I was questioning my assignment a little bit.  I didn't want to start getting to a place where all I am doing is talking about the abuse, and just staying there.  I was feeling like I was bringing things out in people, that maybe should have remained within in them.  I know that sounds absolutely crazy, especially since I always say your voice has a right to be heard. But so many times I hear people say that you shouldn't be stuck in the past.  They say you should just forgive, and move on, and don't stay there.  So I was questioning whether or not I was actually moving forward, or just staying with this story.  I hear so many stories of abuse, and it seems like those people just tell their story, and they're done.  Here I am sharing mine with the world!  I was thinking maybe I was making a bigger deal out of it than it needs to be.  But now I know that is far from the truth!

Live life on purpose, wow!  Today at the Oprah Lifeclass, there were so many things that just hit home.  Most of us know that we were created for a purpose.  And if you don't know, well now you do, so your excuse is gone!  I know now my purpose is to be an advocate and speak out against sexual abuse.  It is also to encourage other women who have gone through abuse, to speak up as well.  Our voices can be used to come against and stop this demonic behavior.  Oprah made an excellent point about women always worrying about the thoughts of others.   We don't want people to think that we think we are better, or we think we are all that.  I am so guilty of that.  As I said in my last blog, it has been less than six months since my sister and I have shared our story.  I keep thinking that people are looking at me sideways, because either they are tired of hearing about it, or  they have been open about it for years, and wondering who am I trying to be an advocate.  I have yet to have personal counseling.  But the real question I had to ask myself is, who am I not to be??  There is a saying that says something like, "somebody should do something about that, I guess that somebody is me!"  I have always known that God wanted to use me for a higher purpose, and be an active leader.  I just didn't know in what capacity.  When you find your purpose in life, there will be questions and there will be doubts, but you cannot worry about what people say, think, or feel.  I learned today that if you allow people to have a say so in your purpose, it will limit your vision.  People have limitations on what they think you can accomplish.  The truth is what God has spoken to you and what He has ordained, no one can do anything about it.  I don't care if you have five college degrees, or dropped out of school.  Don't let anyone, and ESPECIALLY yourself, talk you out of your purpose.  There is too much work for us to do.

To all of my survivors or victims, you may be scared and feel like there is no hope for you.  You may be scared of what others say, or that others may reject you.  You may be correct, but so what!!!  It's time to stop giving people the front seat of our lives, they don't deserve that place.  Allow God to lead you in moving forward and speaking up.  No one can tell you how you should feel, what you should say, or not say.  I know that God does not want you to be a slave to your abuser.  Whatever happened to you, you have every right to speak up!!  It is okay to allow yourself to heal.  As long as I have breath in my body, I will not be quiet.  God gave me an assignment and I am sticking to it.  Yes it gets scary and lonely, but I can't think of anything better I could be doing.  Your silence can be the reason your blessings are hindered. It could even to tied to your purpose.  Kirk Franklin has a song that says, "There's purpose in your pain, so don't throw it away."  Meaning don't hold on to it by letting it control you, but turn it around and use it for the good of someone else.  You have to learn to trust God with everything you have.  How can you truly be healed when you are holding on to a pain that shouldn't belong to you.  As many more begin to speak up, the world will start to understand that this is a serious matter, and it needs to end.  People need to be disturbed and realize that there are children that even could be their own living with this silence, killing them softly.  It's time to get busy and put an end to sexual abuse.  I am fired up and pray that fire stays lit.  It's so easy to get into a slump, and make up a ton of excuses.  The time for excuses is over.  We have to stop operating in fear, and operate in faith!  It's time to MOVE 4WARD!!

Always remember, Your voice has a right to be heard!!!!  I love you all so much!

From now on, my blogs will be published on Fridays.  So I will talk to you again on Friday.  Also if you know of anyone that can get something from my words, please feel free to send them here.  MUAH!


MOVING 4WARD is now on Facebook!  We have dedicated a page for your support, encouragement, and information.  Due to the sensitivity of the matter it is a closed group so that the public cannot view comments.  If you would like to be added, let me know and I will add you to the group!  

NAKED AND UNASHAMED

It's been almost 4 months since we told our family about the abuse.  It seems so much longer than that to me.  But during that time I have told friends, strangers, Facebook, started a blog, did a recorded interview, and even made an appearance on a T.V. show.  When I think about those things, I'm thinking look at God!  I don't even know how all of that happened!!  I just wanted to tell my mother, but I guess there were other plans as well.  But to to be very honest, even though I am sharing my story with the world, I am still not totally free.

After all of my friends are gone, and my kids are sleep, and the lights are out, I'm left with me and God.  Although people tell me how proud they are of me and my sister, and how strong we are, I don't necessarily feel that way.  I have never truly been free with my emotions.  I don't like being vulnerable, it is a very uncomfortable feeling for me.  It's not easy for me to pour out my feelings or allow my "soft side" to be exposed.  And now that I'm saying this, I'm sure the abuse has a lot to do with it.  I'd rather tell a joke to make someone laugh, then to be naked and allow them to see any hurt that is in me.  I've always had the mentality of "just get over it."  It's funny how God will put you in a situation when you have no choice but to do things that you never thought you could do.  The only thing that keeps me going is when I read or see other survivors tell their stories.  They seem so brave, and so outspoken.  That's when I realize the impact they have on me, and I just pray I have the same impact on someone else.

Everyday I'm learning more and more to be naked and unashamed.  Y'all, this has not been an easy road at all.  Emotions change from day to day.  Sometimes I feel like shrinking back, and just saying forget it.   Sometimes I feel like shouting it out to the world.  Then there are days when I'm wondering when my life will go back to the way it was.  But when it's all said and done, this is for the Glory of God and not my own.  So when the feelings of shame, doubt, confusion, and even joy come, I know where I have to turn.

Spreading the awareness of sexual abuse is so important.  No matter how hard the task may be, I will not allow my voice to go away.  It was silent for way to long.  I encourage each of you to speak up, even if it is to one person.  You're voice has a right to be heard!!

That's all I have for this week.  I pray you all have a blessed and prosperous week, and I will talk to you next Thursday!

Below is a video of a young lady who is speaking out against sexual abuse in a different way.  This is awesome, please watch..

MOVING 4WARD is now on Facebook!  We have dedicated a page for your support, encouragement, and information.  Due to the sensitivity of the matter it is a closed group so that the public cannot view comments.  If you would like to be added, let me know and I will add you to the group!  

MY JOY

Hi everyone!  Before I get started today, I just want to take out the time to thank you for all of your support and kind words.  They are very much appreciated.  It is a blessing for others to see that there are people who care, and want to give their support.  It's not always easy to type every week, but it is very much worth it.  MUAH!!!

This week I wanted to share something uplifting.  Though this is a sensitive subject, there should always be time to take five and smile.  Everything in my life is not perfect, as a matter of fact somethings are just down right jacked up! But I will not allow anything to steal my joy.  I am a single mother with three children, and they keep me extremely busy.  I work and go to school full time.  And now I am a blogger!  Although I barely have time to sit down and breathe, God has allowed me to find joy in my circumstances.  There are times when I am so sick and tired of talking about the abuse.  There are also times when I think you are sick of me talking about the abuse.  But when I think about all the women, as well as men, that are holding a secret, I know I have to move myself out of the way and move forward into my assignment.

I remember a time when I was about six years old and I was playing with a doll, or some toy, in my mother's room.  I was just doing what six year olds do.  While I was on her bed I can remember as plain as day something said to me, "there is something special about you."  At the time I remember thinking in my head, wow there is something special about me.  I didn't know what it was, and honestly didn't really pay it anymore attention, but I will never forget it.  I truly believe that was God's way of protecting my mind.   He knew that a time would come when I would have to remember that.  His love is absolutely amazing!  Now I do have to admit that right before I started blogging when I was trying to understand my assignment, I questioned some things.  My thought was that if God knew this was my purpose and my assignment, then He surely had to have known that I was going to be a victim of childhood rape.  So if that is the case, and He knew that, then why would He have allowed me to endure something like that?  I didn't question for long, because one thing that I did know was that God would never purposely make that situation happen.  Sadly we live in a sinful world, and people will not always make wise choices.  It's terrible that things of this nature happen, but they do.  I also know that no matter what happens in my life, good or bad, it will all work out for my good.  In this case not only for my good, but for the good of others.  Now other people can know my past, and see that even though it was not favorable, I still have a smile on my face!  Although you may have gone through the same thing as me, or may have experienced another form of abuse, I want you to know that weeping only endures for a night.  I wept for over 30 years, and didn't even know it!!  I wasn't physically weeping, but the silence was draining me emotionally.  If you all could know the joy I have in my heart today.  I am no longer bound!  Amazing that a terrible situation that was meant to destroy me, ended up being the one thing to turn my whole world around.  My breakthrough came when I finally decided to open up mouth and allow victory to come forth.  Amazing!!!

I held on to that 3/4 year old little girl all these years.  When my sister and I first told our cousin what happened, she wanted us to immediately tell our mother, but we were resistant.  I remember her stepping back and looking at us.  Her words were, "why are you two acting like you're still 4 and 5?"  At that moment I thought she is absolutely right!  We held on to those little girls all that time.  While we were so busy trying to bury that situation, we were also burying peace, hope, and joy.  I'm sure somebody is thinking, how can you have joy out of that situation?  I no longer have the burden of holding on to it.  It's out now, and hiding that part of my life is no longer an option.  I found out how to be naked and unashamed.  Whatever you are holding on to that is keeping tears in your heart, it's time to let it go!  Weeping endures for a night, but joy will come in the morning!  Be encouraged, and remember your voice has a right to be heard!

Have a fantastic week!

MOVING 4WARD is now on Facebook!  We have dedicated a page for your support, encouragement, and information.  Due to the sensitivity of the matter it is a closed group so that the public cannot view comments.  If you would like to be added, let me know and I will add you to the group!